i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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