I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
no. you can't hotbox the world.
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Randomize
