Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
Randomize
