I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Randomize
