Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Randomize
