Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
