she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
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