The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize
