i already hear my dad disowning me
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
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