He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
I woke up after 12 hours of being wildly intoxicated, got jizz on my face, and woke up in a different bed than I passed out in. My makeup is still perfect. I'm writing Revlon a thank you note.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
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