idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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