I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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