and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
i think i just lost a toe
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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