he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Randomize
