I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
