she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
These Dirty People Haven’t Told Their SO About Their Kinky Fetish
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
This is Why People Stop Sex Halfway Through
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .