do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize