I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
