Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
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