You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize