Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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