I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
