So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
