I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
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