I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
Mike is offhisass drunk and just sat down next to my sister and said "If you gained 30 pounds and stopped reading poetry, I would be attracted to you. Now, your little sister, attractive, even though she's basically the same person as you- she just pulls it off better because she's 15."
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
Did we literally take a cab across the street
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
Can vaginas get frostbite?
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize
