susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
Randomize
