Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Guess who just stumbled into work hungover, wearing yesterday's clothes, covered in hickeys and glitter, and carrying a giant bottle of rum in her purse.
I just took plan B at work.
This is the greatest story of all time.
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