you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Randomize
