I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
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