last night i told the bartender i only have 3 days left to live so i wouldnt have to pay for drinks
this morning i woke up with a nothing but a pair of what i believe are fairy wings on - and the bartender in my bed
he thinks ill be dead by monday and still came home w me.. WTF?
messed up. what color are the wings?
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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