bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
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