How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
im six kinds of drunk right now
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Randomize
