tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
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You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
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You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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