real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
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