I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
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