I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
he had hair everywhere except his balls
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
