it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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