Sponge bath it is.
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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