he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
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