I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
Randomize
