Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Randomize
