talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
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