it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
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