my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
I just cut my nipple shaving
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
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