did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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