weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
