Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
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