Texts From Last Night

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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  I woke up wearing no shirt sleeping next to a half-eaten grilled cheese.

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  Well did you call the grilled cheese yet? Or r u waiting the usual 3 days?

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  (215): I woke up wearing no shirt sleeping next to a half-eaten grilled cheese. (717): Well did you call the grilled cheese yet? Or r u waiting the usual 3 days? http://tfl.nu/n2pa
  Replies (6) Good night (3472) Bad night (666)
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  (864): View more from South Carolina

  we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me

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  (864): we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me http://tfl.nu/3ztm
  Replies (27) Good night (3938) Bad night (810)
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  (949): View more from California

  Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.

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  (949): Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing. http://tfl.nu/xh2g
  Replies (11) Good night (2832) Bad night (885)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??

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  (519): i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man?? http://tfl.nu/83cs
  Replies (10) Good night (4446) Bad night (1100)
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  (706): View more from Georgia

  Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.

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  (706): Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze. http://tfl.nu/gtjj
  Replies (9) Good night (5227) Bad night (980)
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  (207): View more from Maine

  winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.

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  (207): winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer. http://tfl.nu/n491
  Replies (8) Good night (2704) Bad night (839)
• Favorite

  (813): View more from Florida

  I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.

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  (813): I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester. http://tfl.nu/cawp
  Replies (25) Good night (3140) Bad night (775)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.

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  (513): My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked. http://tfl.nu/x6u7
  Replies (6) Good night (4550) Bad night (838)
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  (757): View more from Virginia

  I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.

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  (757): I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you. http://tfl.nu/6wwz
  Replies (5) Good night (1921) Bad night (718)
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.

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  (860): She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused. http://tfl.nu/7uxa
  Replies (12) Good night (3351) Bad night (1126)
• Favorite

  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.

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  (262): Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI. http://tfl.nu/aihj
  Replies (3) Good night (819) Bad night (1223)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."

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  (603): Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner." http://tfl.nu/q4fy
  Replies (16) Good night (2634) Bad night (529)
• Favorite

  (602): View more from Arizona

  You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?

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  (602): You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me? http://tfl.nu/mi92
  Replies (9) Good night (730) Bad night (4444)
• Favorite

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.

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  (202): This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ. http://tfl.nu/lngt
  Replies (19) Good night (914) Bad night (369)
• Favorite

  (252): View more from North Carolina

  They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.

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  (252): They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher. http://tfl.nu/qrpm
  Replies (7) Good night (764) Bad night (232)

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