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• (860): View more from Connecticut

  You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.

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• (804): View more from Virginia

  it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.

  Fav 12 741 3594

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• (713): View more from Texas

  I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...

  Fav 19 2863 828

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• (973): View more from New Jersey

  i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house

  Fav 11 12621 1163

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  25 True Facts That Sound Fake AF

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• (706): View more from Georgia

  I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.

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• (808): View more from Hawaii

  I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.

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• (734): View more from Michigan

  I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that

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• (727): View more from Florida

  Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize

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• (401): View more from Rhode Island

  She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.

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  27 Hairstyles That Always Come With A Matching Personality

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question

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• (949): View more from California

  He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick

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• (901): View more from Tennessee

  Do what your heart wants. . .

  (504): View more from Louisiana

  My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis

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• (619): View more from California

  I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.

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• (623): View more from Arizona

  It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station

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• (812): View more from Indiana

  FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG

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