I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
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