well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
Randomize
